What's Your Gift?

I hate that question.

Some one asked me that question today, and I immediately dodged it. They didn't mean anything by it, but I think that's what you would call a loaded question. It assumes that everyone has one gift, and the corollary is: if you aren't used frequently in at least one gift you are doing something wrong. So if you answer that question, it's like you are admitting that all of that is true. (If that is true then Jesus was sinning until he was thirty because he wasn't healing or prophesying over anybody.)

What's more, if you agree with that statement to begin with, there is more negative side effects because what could possibly come from talking about gifts that the Holy Spirit is allowing you to be used in? Pride.

There is one concept that I really hope the Christian culture comes to terms with: no one cares how holy you are.

• They don't care about your Christian pedigree.
  
• They don't care how long you have serving in church.
  
• They don't care if you are a credentialed minister or whatever title you have been given by your Christian community.
  
• They don't care how many people have been healed after you prayed for them.
• They don't care how many hits your Christ-centered blog has.
• They don't care what caliber people you have prophesied over.

Recently I have declared war on titles. I hope I don't take it too far (email to keep me accountable if I do), but the reason is a good one I think. In my experience in Christian culture, I see a reoccurring cycle of self-definition that goes in the complete opposite direction of grace. Here's how it goes:

Stage 1. Seek God, and get saved through repentance
Stage 2. Get used by God in some way (feel validated)
Stage 3. Seek to be used more in some way (feel more validated)
Stage 4. Define your "gifting" with a title and find a place where they can be used most (feel most validated)

My problem with this picture starts around stage 2 when the believer starts learning that God desires to use them in His mission. Suddenly after being used once in this way, they become aware of the validating feeling they get when something good comes from their wanting to be used. They naturally enjoy this feeling and seek to experience it again and again.

Before they know it, they find themselves stuck in stage 3 where instead of seeking God, they seek more ways to make themselves feel good and have more "spiritual power." Without even considering the possibility that more power in the hands of an undeveloped person is dangerous, they will beat their chest and shed tears with passionate prayers for the Holy Spirit to give them more and more power. Soon everything in their spiritual life revolves around their own ministry. The result is an obnoxious Christian who loves talking about what their church is accomplishing for God's kingdom, and (indirectly) how much God needs them.

Any number of undesirable traits can be developed from here. The most notable are jealousy, arrogance, and a spirit of competitiveness. Soon they find themselves in the prison of their own ministry. The amazing thing is if this ministry were to be taken from them, they might even curse God and stop following Jesus!!

Isn't that insane? And all of that started with wanting to be connected with God. What in the world happened?? Somewhere there was a shift from depending on God to work through your weakness to depending on your usefulness to make you feel better. That sounds like every wack job religion out there: follow this list of rules to feel worthy like the rest of us worthy ones! POOF! Christianity becomes Religianity.

That's why I cringe when conversation turns to topics centered around what people have done or what they do for God. WHO CARES. Seriously, I'm glad you are being used by God. That's great, but don't think you are some kind of spiritual elite if God uses you to do something cool. You didn't deserve it at all to begin with. Nothing you did could earn being a son or daughter of Jesus, so stop giving off the smell that it did.

That's why people like Bill Mauer make movies like "Religulous" ...to take those people down a notch. He didn't produce it because he wants to remove all religion from the planet (why would he care?). He probably did it because he has met a few too many religious people who get their jollies from rubbing their holiness in his face. Thank God for movies like that, hah.

I love this verse: (2 Cor. 11:30) If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness.

What's the result of talking about our weaknesses? Humility (and sometimes laughter, lol). The exact opposite of pride!!

So what's my "gift"? My gift is Jesus Christ who made it so that I don't have to DO SOMETHING to feel validated. I have been made in the image of God, redeemed by God, and I am living a blessed life today only because HE is merciful. I suck at life. He rules at life for me. End of story.